What It Means If He Doesn’t Call

Ever wonder why the man you’re dating and having an amazing time with doesn’t call you very often?

Or worse… stops calling altogether?

If you’ve ever had this happen to you with a man, then you know how FRUSTRATING it can be when a man just suddenly stops calling for what seems like no good reason…

And you’ve spent more time than you’d like to admit wondering what happened and what YOU might have done wrong.

Most women in this situation fall into a kind of trap that seems to work against them…

Instead of recognizing that the man not calling is an important signal in of itself, they become obsessed with wanting to know what he’s thinking and WHY he’s acting this way.

It’s time you learned what it really means if a man isn’t calling… and what to do about it to quickly “turn the tables” in your favor so that he’s the one calling and asking you out.

“First of all I think you are great and have learned a lot from reading your book. I am divorced and have been dating a widower for about a month. We get together once or twice a week - I don’t expect more than that - as he lives about half an hour away from me. Our dates are great and there is a definite physical attraction on both sides. My problem is that in-between dates I don’t hear from him. I know that he works hard and is bringing up 3 children on his own - but how long does it take to pick up the phone and ask me how I am? Am I asking too much? Is it too soon to expect anything? I don’t want to complain and
frighten him off, as I really like him. What do you suggest?”

Looking forward to hearing from you
- R.J. from Illinois

Ok, let me get the facts straight here…

You’ve been out with a man for an entire month. (Not long at all, and effectively NO TIME in a man’s mind)

You’ve seen each other once or twice a week or so for 3-4 whole weeks. (Not even enough for a man to see you as “dating”)

And you know he is busy and raising three young children on his own. (His attention and focus is admittedly elsewhere)

But in just a few dates you’ve already become disappointed and “bothered” by the way he’s being… and you’re wishing he would CHANGE.

DANGER.

This is bad for YOU, and for him.

The approach and mindset you have right now is almost guaranteed to make this man see you as too demanding and “needy” to want to be with you, when it’s just a few weeks in.

So I hope you haven’t started talking about all your feelings of disappointment with him yet.. because it wouldn’t go over well with the way you’re looking at things.

But here’s the worst part of all this…

“Am I asking for too much from him?”

Simply put - YES. You’re asking for too much because you shouldn’t be ASKING HIM for what you want and then hoping that he “meets your demands”.

This is a LOSING APPROACH that will 100% guarantee that a man won’t want to give you what you’re looking for.

Why?

Well, it’s not because you actually are asking for too much.

It’s OK to know that you’d like a man in your life who you’re involved with to call you more.

But this isn’t about whether this is ok for you to ask for.

No. This is all about THE WAY you ask, and the emotions and expectations a man will see that you’re holding onto when you open your mouth and you’ve been going through a whole lot of disappointment and frustration with him… while he’s thinking that you’ve been out on a few fun dates and everything is fine and dandy.

WHY ISN’T HE CALLING MORE?

Here’s something you might not have thought about…

Men often communicate and show their feelings in less “direct” ways than simply saying and expressing how the feel.

In fact, most men are a whole lot more conscious of DOING things than they are of how they effect and relate to others on an emotional level.

So… when a man doesn’t call, it’s often NOT an indication of something else going on for him that he might want to talk to you about.

Often times it’s simply an indication that he doesn’t actually FEEL like spending more time around you.

So he simply doesn’t call.

In other words, when it comes to men and dating, it’s best to look at a man’s ACTIONS and BEHAVIORS as the only TRUE INDICATION of how they really feel inside.

As a woman, you can probably spin your wheels dreaming up all kinds of incredible and elaborate ideas and scenarios for why a man isn’t calling and what it means about his feelings and your situation.

But, if you’re interested in doing more than analyzing and trying to figure out things in your own mind… then it’s best to “read” the men you’re dating early on by what they DO… and NOT what they SAY.

Which means… a man not calling you often, or at all, is an important signal in of itself.

If a man is spending time with a woman he “likes”, but he isn’t sure if he would want much more than a few casual dates with her…then here’s what he does…

He only calls her every once in a while to keep the “connection” open… making sure not to let the connection die, but also making sure not to spend too much time with a woman or show her too many signs of interest that might indicate he’d want a more serious relationship.

And yes, some men actually think this way and are CONSCIOUS about NOT CALLING women very often if they don’t want things to get more serious.

While other men who don’t call are usually doing this inadvertently as they’re going about their life and not thinking much about wanting more with a woman.

Here’s what you need to take away from all this…

If a man isn’t calling and you’d like him to call more and to grow in your relationship together, it really doesn’t matter WHY.

The only things that matter are if he’s not calling because he’s not interested in a relationship with you ever.

Or…

If he’s not calling because he’s just not feeling “that way” for you YET.

Which begs the question - how do you get a man feeling “that way” for you if he’s not feeling it yet?

Well, for starters, you need to STOP doing the things that will promise that a man WON’T feel it for you.

Things like CALLING HIM TOO MUCH.

Or getting upset and hurt that he hasn’t called when there’s no “relationship” yet,and it’s just YOUR EXPECTATION that he SHOULD call more.

Or generally taking on any other needy, clingy, or overly emotional behaviors that will have a man thinking you’d be nothing but a pain if he was to get to know you and involved in a real relationship with you.

I’ll talk to you again soon, and best of
luck in Life and Love.

Your Friend,

Christian Carter

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