Quickly Get A Man’s Attention & Interest

Written by Christian Carter |  2 Comments

How many times have you met a great guy and wanted to get to know him better… but he just didn’t seem to notice you or feel the same way about you?

You talked and interacted with him… but you didn’t quite know how to make that more personal “connection” with him.

And he didn’t seem to “make the first move” the way you might have wanted him to.

Which was frustrating, because you wanted to spend time with him… but you didn’t know how to get the conversation started and “break the ice”.

And the thought of “approaching” him directly and telling him how you felt seemed like the very last thing to do.

So what did you do?

You didn’t do or say ANYTHING.

You waited and tried to “indirectly” get him to notice you.

And while you were waiting for him… you tried to find ways to “accidentally” be at the places he was at.

You’d try and find out what he was doing and where he was going to be… and then you’d find a reason to go there too so you could end up in his physical presence… in the hopes that
something would happen.

But still nothing happened.

He didn’t really even “notice you”… and he didn’t take any interest. And you felt foolish for being the one to have to “chase” him.

No matter how hard you tried, no matter how many “hints” you dropped, or how many “signals” you tried to send his way… NOTHING came of it.

It was like you were somehow “invisible” to him in that romantic kind of way.

Not a great feeling, right?

If you’ve been in this kind of situation with a man before, then you know it can make you feel awful.

In fact, it can be downright PAINFUL and FRUSTRATING to the point where you don’t know what to do next and you become a little hopeless and down on yourself.

If you’re like lots of women, then in situations like this in your past you’ve ended up either:

A) NEVER sharing your feelings with the man you were crazy about

Obviously, this gets you nowhere…

B) Finally breaking down and telling him how much you like him and would like to go out with him

If you’ve been down this second road before, then you know it doesn’t get you very far with a man either – even though it makes sense that you should tell a man, and that
he would respond.

But what really happens when you quickly come out and share your feelings for a man in this way?

I think you unfortunately know the answer already of what happens when you do this…

Instead of him being swept up by your feelings and affections and embracing you… he feels immediately REPELLED by you and your feelings.

And as if his negative reaction in the moment wasn’t bad enough… he stops communicating with you all together after that, and even the “friendship” you had is gone.


Now, here’s where it gets really strange and fascinating…

For lots of women in these kinds of situations with men, this is all just a setup for an even bigger mistake they make that’s the proverbial “nail in the coffin”.

For lots of women, the more a man doesn’t seem to notice them or return their affections… the more they SECRETLY CRAVE the man’s attention and have an even stronger urge to keep sharing more of their feelings with him.

Which of course only makes the man want to get farther and farther away from them the more that they try and share.

I wish this wasn’t how things worked… but I’ve seen this exact thing happen so many times that I can see this mistake coming for some women a mile away.

But if this mistake is so common, why do so many women make this mistake and engage in the same kind of COUNTERPRODUCTIVE behavior with men?

I’ll give you the short answer…

It’s because most women think that the more they share their feelings… the more a man will like them and develop those “romantic feelings” toward them.

This is 100% WRONG when it comes to men and dating.

The FALSE BELIEF that most women hold here, that drives them to try and share more to get a man interested is that if they just say enough about how they feel… then the man will open his eyes, feel the same way, and recognize what a perfect couple they could be.

Here’s the point…

When it comes to meeting men, getting things started, and “dating”… sharing more of your “deeper” feelings early on can have the exact OPPOSITE EFFECT of what you might think.

Instead of a man feeling flattered… he’ll often get TURNED OFF by you the more you try to tell him how attractive and wonderful you think he is.

Now, this whole idea of having to “censor” yourself and your feelings… or not being able to share who you really are and how you really feel might bother you.

In fact, it might bother you a lot.

But the reality is that if you care about having a man actually RESPOND to you the way you’d like him to respond… then you’re going to have to start to learn and take RESPONSIBILITY for the way WHAT YOU communicate to him makes him FEEL.

In other words, if you walk up to a man you like and say to him,

“Hey, I really like you…”

You’re NOT going to get you the results you want 9 times out of 10. (At least not in terms of starting a “real” lasting relationship)

What’s important if you want a man to RESPOND to you and reciprocate your feelings is to first get him LIKING YOU and feeling that magic thing called ATTRACTION for you.

And more importantly, to get him “feeling it” for you BEFORE you tell him how you feel.

So then when you do share with him how you feel… EVERYTHING will be different and he’ll be VERY receptive to you and your feelings.

Maybe even a little too “receptive”… and you’ll have to do your best to keep his hands off of you (if you want)

Luckily, if you’re ready… I can help you avoid ever having to be in these kinds of frustrating situations with men ever again.

If you want the quickest way I know of to capture a man’s attention and interest, and get the conversation started to where HE is asking YOU out… then you need to read this special letter I’ve written explaining exactly what you need to know in order to instantly capture a man’s eye.

Now, I want to show you a few QUICK TIPS to help you get what you want from your love life.

If you’re ready to meet a great guy, or you’re looking to make things happen with a great guy you already know… then here’s where to start-

First, you need to know how to cross that “invisible boundary” between being “friends” with a man… and connecting on a “romantic” level where a deeper level of affection and intimacy is possible.

For lots of women, they have NO IDEA of how to cross this line with a man in a way that is fun, easy, and most importantly makes a man feel MORE INTERESTED in being around them.

Here’s where to start…

Tip #1: Get his attention in a way that will intrigue him so much he won’t be able to resist wanting to get to know you better… and will think of you as the kind of woman he wants from the START.

Ever strike up a conversation with a man you were trying to get close to… and it either led you nowhere, or you ended up just being “friends”?

You were close to him, and you talked and shared things with him… and your feelings started to grow the more you got to know him.

But he didn’t seem to have the same feelings growing inside him, and you could tell.

You wished there was some way you could break through and have him see you differently.

Lots of women who DON’T know how to “break the ice” with a man on a romantic level and end up either not getting a man’s interest, or just being stuck in the friend zone no matter what they do or say.

Trying too hard to connect with a man if he DOESN’T FEEL that initial SPARK of romantic or sexual interest does NOTHING to convince him that he should spend his time with you.

If you want to break the pattern of constantly getting stuck in the “friend zone” with a man… and you’d like to know how you can cross that invisible boundary between… then you need to
know how and where to take the conversation to a ROMANTIC LEVEL where a man will quickly start “feeling it” for you.

And you need to know how to do this without making the mistake of coming off desperate, or actually turning a man off in the process like so many women accidentally do.

Tip #2: Learn The Essential Skill Of “Backleading”

Do you ever think or feel like it should be the man who makes the first move?

Let me answer the important question here that so many women wonder about when it comes to meeting men-

“Is it bad if I ask him out?”

Or put it another way, “Shouldn’t the man be the one to ask the woman out?”

Here’s the deal…

It’s BEST if a man makes the move first, if you want to set the foundation for a more serious and lasting relationship from the start.


If a man isn’t making the move, what’s a woman to do?

Is it then bad for a woman to make the first move?

The answer is NO. It’s not bad.

But only if you know what you’re doing, and you know how to avoid the deadly mistake of setting up a long term “courtship pattern” where YOU are the one chasing HIM.

This pattern over the long term will NOT work out well for you. Period. End of story.

So… then what can you do if a man isn’t making the first move, but you want to make something happen?

Here’s what to do…

I have an amazing friend who’s a ballroom dancer. She’s INCREDIBLE.

One day we were sitting around and she told me about how it’s important in dancing to have the roles where one LEADS, and the other dancer FOLLOWS.

This is, of course, one of the oldest and simplest human behavior patterns around.

Anways… here’s how it related to you and men and dating.

My friend, the dancer, shared with me what she would do when her male dance partner was supposed to LEAD, but wasn’t doing a great job of it.

Instead of CRITICIZING him, or taking the LEAD herself (which wouldn’t work out well or get her what she ultimately wanted)… she would do what she called “BACKLEADING”.

This is where she is able to subtly direct a man to lead and do the things he needs to be doing… but she would do it in a way where she didn’t take the lead herself.

She was able to CREATE THE SPACE and the opportunity for the man to lead… without having to take the lead herself.

As a result, she gets enjoy the process of following his lead in direction she had wanted things to go in the first place. (Nice!)

And all along, the man is a better dance partner AND MORE SATISFIED and ENGAGED in the process because he still felt like is the one making things happen on HIS TERMS.


Now, I’m sure you’re already picking up on where this is going when it comes to men and dating…

If you can learn this amazing and subtle skill called BACKLEADING with men in when it comes to dating… and you can help a man take the lead in bringing you and your relationship closer from the very beginning… then the “dating process” and the relationship you create is going to be fun and easy.

On the other hand, if you keep on trying to take the lead for a man and tell him where you want to go… then he’s naturally going to start RESISTING you and not enjoy the process.

He’ll feel “pressured” by you and he won’t want to follow you lead – because he won’t feel like it’s what HE WANTS, or his idea.

In life, it can make things a whole lot easier if you can find ways to work WITH the “energy” and the people around you…

Instead of constantly going AGAINST the grain and trying to get everyone to do and see things YOUR WAY.

If you’d like to learn how to quickly engage a man on a “romantic” level (even when he’s not showing interest in you initially)…

And you’d like to know what to DO and SAY in the first meeting, and on the first several dates or phone calls to create the kind of ATTRACTION that will have him “courting” you.

I’ll talk to you again soon, and best of luck in Life and Love.

Your Friend,

Christian Carter

Categories : Attracting Men

Christian Carter is a leading advisor to women on dating, relationships, connection and love. An expert in psychology, communication and behavior, Christian Carter has developed foundational concepts that help women understand men, dating and relationships. Visit Christian's official website, by clicking here.


  1. Caroline says:

    When I want a man to notice me, I wait for our eyes to lock and I grant him a smile with my lips only and my eyes sparkling. I don’t show teeth yet because I find that I look desperate.

    Then, I don’t look at him again for another hour or two. I want to create intrigue. He may come up and talk with me or he will move in a way that I just have to notice him. He is asking for another smile that way.

    Works every time…

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  2. carol says:

    does aman whom yiu might know in generral lock eyes with you accidentally

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